“Dreams are like stars…you may never touch them,
but if you follow them they will lead you to your destiny.”

As I sit here trying to put words on paper, I am listening to a lively discussion on women and happiness. According to this recent hullabaloo, I mean research, since 1972 (and the onset of the feminist movement), women have become increasingly “un” happier. Why? Because life is too busy and women are trapped trying to balance career, family, marriage, life, etc. Would you agree or disagree?

I would have to wholeheartedly agree. I spend a great deal of my time loving and listening to women (of all ages) and sense a deep discontent percolating under the surface of their lives. Not always visible to the naked eye, but when allowed—comes bubbling up with tears and pain. It begins with the quiver of the lip and then flows freely.

I felt this way this past June. Once again, as I have expressed in earlier posts, I bought into the lie of our culture by standing at the buffet of opportunities and good works, overstuffing my life until I was bloated by “too much of a good thing.” Graduate work. Ministry opportunities. Teaching. Family commitments. Shall I continue?

But, then, my husband ripped through the rut I had so carelessly dug, and swept me away for 30 days. I had no idea how those 30 days would change my life. If I could, I would demand that every person I know and love do the same thing. Being taken out of this stressed culture and my carefully crafted comfort zones, showed me that life can be lived differently. I knew it mentally, but in Europe experienced it physically. They do things differently on that continent. Now, I am not naive, I am sure there is stress. But, it is different.

For me, the lightbulb went off while walking down a dusky Tuscan street. I have dreamed of going to Tuscany for years. Never in a million years, did I think Tuscany would hold my destiny in its hands. Rob and I lived in an authentic Tuscan one-bedroom farmhouse villa for six days. No screens on the windows. No air conditioning. Just lots of mosquitoes, a great deal of sweat, and cute little geckos. And, an adorable blue writing desk (which, I never used). Tuscany would take time to process. Writing would come later.

As Rob and I walked the Tuscan streets, I became very aware that I wanted my life to change. I came to the conclusion, after much reflection, that I can’t live the next half of my life in the same way—caught in the web of overachieving, legalistic spirituality, people-pleasing, ego-stroking and self-inflicted pressure, that plays out in feeling responsible for everything and everybody. Don’t get me wrong, all of these experiences have shaped the person, wife, mother, teacher, speaker, friend, and ministry leader  that I am today, but now, it is time to live differently, especially when it comes to my faith. For years, I have stood before women’s groups proclaiming that God doesn’t desire his children to be frazzled, fractured and falling apart, yet have not always listened to my own teaching. Somewhere, in the Tuscan hills, I finally heard that message. I noticed that in every little Tuscan village (and the villages are miles apart) there was only one church. Unlike America, where a church can sit on every corner. I had several thoughts on this subject:

1. If I had been born in a different country, what would my faith look like?
2. Is my Christianity clothed in American culture or is it truly authentic faith?
3. What is authentic faith? What does that look like?
4. Can I keep the intimacy I felt with Christ in Europe when I return to America? To my ruts? To my conditioned responses and certain expectations of others when it comes to how I should live out my Christianity?

And, I surmised, that there are men, women and children in Tuscany that love Jesus with all their hearts. There has to be. And, if that is the case, they are doing so with only one church in a village and with far less resources than I have at my fingertips. Somehow, I sense that it is just less complicated. Less crowded. Less crazy.

I am still processing. I will be for a long time, I think. But, I am committed to change. Perhaps you have felt the same angst with your faith walk. The same tension for more authenticity. Do you think our faith is dressed in American culture? If so, how might we change that?

At the same time I was wrestling with this, I received an email invitation to speak in Bangkok, Thailand. Talk about moving out of your comfort zone! I accepted that invitation and in less than two weeks, I will be boarding a plane to yet another major life change. I have no doubt that I will get some answers to my questions.

So, today, take a moment to reflect. It doesn’t have to be on a dusky, Tuscan road. It can be at your kitchen sink. Do you sense any discontent percolating under the surface of your life? Begin a conversation with God about it. Let it surface. And, then, listen for his gentle whisper. Perhaps he will lead you to make one small step towards a more authentic, vibrant life and enable you to live differently.

“Lord, show us that abundant life You speak of in John 10:10.
We desire to walk closely with You.
To hear your gentle whisper.
To sense Your presence afresh today.
Push us out of our comfort zones so we can
experience all that You have for us.
Amen.”

Lesson One: A Handful of Tranquility

I’ve been home from my whirlwind-trip-of-a-lifetime-to-Europe with my husband for almost two months now (whew, long sentence!) And, I admit, it has taken me this long to begin putting into words the life-changing lessons I learned on our journey. A few weeks before our trip, I sensed the Lord saying that he was going to alter the landscape of my life (read, “Alter the Whole Landscape” from July 10) I had no idea what he meant by that, but after my husband’s surprise gift, I do.

First and foremost, this trip showed me that I don’t want to live the next twenty-five years of my life in the same way as the last twenty-five years. Oh, don’t get me wrong, they have been blessed beyond measure, but the dominant characteristic of these years is my constant state of “over” doing. I concluded that I am moving out of “The Land of Over”:

• Overdo
• Overcommit
• Over schedule
• Over-the-Top Goal Setting (unreasonable goals)
• Overeat (esp. sweets at night, smile!)
• Overspend on the un-necessities (is this a word?)
• Overachieve (ouch! this one hurts the most)
• Over exercise (yes, its all about balance)
• Over analyze (sometimes we must accept the facts/accept in faith)
• Over step boundaries (know when to speak/not to speak)

Over, in the Greek, means, “hyper.” Taking that one step further, we see that hyper means, “seriously or obsessively concerned.” All in all, it just means, “a bit much; a bit out of balance.” I come by this personality quirk quite honestly. I know I born with a God-given capacity to achieve (we all are) but somewhere along the journey of my life, something clicked inside of me to take residence in “The Land of Over.” That click became the rhythm by which I paced my life. Do more. Be more. More. More. More. And the great travesty of this rhythm is that it played out in very good things. Excelling is what America (and may I add the American church) is all about. This became quite obvious as Rob and I traveled through Europe:

• Businesses close for several hours in the middle of the day.
• Life definitely slows down on Sundays (not much was open).
• Mealtime is a celebration. No drive-thru’s. Beautiful tables set, both indoors and outdoors, where men, women and children sit for hours enjoying their meals.
• The pace of life is slower (except on Italian roadways).

Now, I know there are overachievers in Europe, I am not naive, but something was different. Perhaps I just needed a change of scenery to see my own weaknesses. A break from the rapid routine which I lovingly call my life. It is no one’s fault but my own. I claim full responsibility. But, I know that I need to change. What will this look like? Well, I believe I found the answer yesterday in Ecclesiastes 4:6 (NIV), “Better one handful with tranquillity than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.” The Message Bible says it this way, “One handful of peaceful repose Is better than two fistfuls of worried work—More spitting into the wind.”

(Another tranquil moment. . .not far from where I found the snail.)

The minute I read this scripture, I remembered a picture I had taken while on a hike in Leukerbad, Switzerland (see above picture). It was a beautiful day where the wind was full of crisp whispers. I sat down on a carpet of soft, green grass. Nestled deep in the grass, I found a small snail. As I admired the spiral pattern on its shell (which we see so often in nature), I thought of its simplicity. Its quiet existence. For some odd reason, I placed it on the palm of my hand and shot a picture. Looking back, I can see that God knew two months later this little snail would confirm wise Solomon’s words in Eccles. 4:6 and remind me of that moment when I felt such deep, restful peace. That moment when I realized I couldn’t go on living my life in “The Land of Over.”

I’m not done wrestling with this life change. In fact, I am right in the midst of it. I find myself asking, “But, Lord, isn’t one handful a cop out if I am capable of two handfuls? I want to be found faithful stewarding the talents you have given me.” And then, I hear his still small voice say, “Just remember the key: one handful with tranquility, not two handfuls with toil and chasing of the wind.”

The root of tranquility is tranquil which simply means, “Free from commotion or tumult; free from or unaffected by disturbing emotions.” Key: FREE

Oh, I want to be free. Free from agitating voices that prod me to imbalance and commotion. Free from the whirlwind of life in “The Land of Over.” I am so grateful for a God who opens our eyes and constantly watches over us. If you find yourself with two handfuls of toil today, may God help you release it. And in the release, help you scoop up a handful of tranquility from His Word.

“He who believes in God is not careful for the morrow,
but labors joyfully and with a great heart.
‘For He gives His beloved, as in sleep.’ They must work and watch,
yet never be careful or anxious,
but commit all to Him, and live in serene tranquility;
with a quiet heart, as one who sleeps safely and quietly.”
(Martin Luther, 1483 – 1546)

 

Psalm 46:1-3 (MSG)

“God is a safe place to hide,
ready to help when we need him.
We stand fearless at the cliff-edge of doom,
courageous in seastorm and earthquake,
Before the rush and roar of oceans,
the tremors that shake mountains.”

I saw this billboard in Dulles Airport — minutes before we embarked on our trip to Europe. Of course it captured my eye. I looked at Rob and said — “Oh no, our computer is NOT our fortress. God is our fortress.” Having written “Rock-Solid Families: Transforming an Ordinary Home into a Fortress of Faith,” I have a real affinity for the word fortress. So, what happens my  first half-hour in Paris? Rob and I accidentally leave our 5th bag (carrying my Mac laptop and all ticket vouchers for the museums on our trip) in the taxi. All I could think about was this billboard. “Lord, I know my computer is not my fortress, but it is my new MAC!” I sat down, in a very disturbed state, while Rob took over. He became my strong fortress. O me of little faith. To make a long story short (because Rob is ready to get on the road for our trip to Lauterbraunnen, Switzerland — as am I), God intervened and a very honest taxi driver brought our 5th bag to our hotel. To God be the glory.

As my trip of a lifetime continues, there HAVE BEEN and WILL BE more opportunities to rely on GOD, MY FORTRESS. 

Today, as you move through your day, I pray that God is your FORTRESS. You can rely on HIM. Rest on HIM. Reach out to HIM. Stand fearless at the cliff-edge of your circumstances.

“The secret of a disciple’s life is devotion to Jesus Christ,
and the characteristic of the life is its unobtrusiveness.
It is like a corn of wheat, which falls into the ground and dies,
but presently it will spring up and alter the whole landscape“
(Oswald Chambers, June 19).

When I read these words a few weeks ago, I prayed a simple prayer.
“Lord, alter the whole landscape of my life if it needs it.”
Quite honestly, the last six months have been laden with stressful situations,
graduate work, teaching responsibilities, speaking engagements and
ministry opportunities, private counseling moments and
the ever-daunting familial duties of wifery and mothering. Slowly,
I have felt my health diminshing, beginning with intense pains around
my heart and into my neck and jaw. Then, heaviness and sighing, followed
by an ever present mantle of responsibilities that were weighing me down.

Then, my husband surprised me with a MONTH LONG TRIP TO EUROPE,
starting in Paris, then Giverny, then Switzerland, and finally,
ITALY (my long awaited trip to Tuscany).
When he first told me, I was stunned and I remained in this condition for several days.
With only 16 days to plan and prepare, the stress increased. I can honestly say, I have actually been
panicked at times. Did I mention that I have been working on a book on TRUSTING GOD for several
years now? Why am I surprised that my life circumstances rise up to challenge the words I have penned?

So, needless to say, God answered my little prayer and is
completing ALTERING THE WHOLE LANDSCAPE of my little life.
Tomorrow, we fly to Paris.
The journey begins.

In honor of this trip of a lifetime, I bought a brand-new
MOLESKIN journal (can you smell the leather and fresh, crisp pages?)
The blank pages beckon. This weary in well-doing pilgrim is off for some
spiritual renewal and rejuvenation. I need rest. I need time away from it all.

Know that you are in my heart and I think of you all daily.
I hope to blog (unless I am completely undone by the beauty of it all)
and I hope to go with the flow of God’s Spirit.

May you find rest for your souls (Psalm 62)!

It’s been a long month and a half. From the looks of my desk, you can see that
I have been totally immersed in my graduate work
(completing yet another 15 page research paper),
completion of grading the research papers of my fourteen home schooled
writing students and tallying the grades for all my writing students,
speaking at my first Exhale Spiritual Retreat at the Rivah!,
guest teaching at a new Women’s Bible Study which turned into a
passionate relationship with fourteen amazing young women,
transitioning the twins from college to home, etc. etc. etc.
The bottom line: my life has been very, very productive—
(you know how I feel about the word busy).  
Thankfully, the season of blogging drought is over and I say,
“Let the river flow.”

Over the next few days, let’s talk about this little four-letter word, flow.
It has arrested my attention lately.

Would you take a quick second and share the
very first thoughts that come to your mind 
when you hear the word—flow?

For me, it’s very late and the flow of my thoughts is waning.
But, as sure as the sun will shine in the morning,
the thoughts will begin afresh.
Be well. 
Be secure.
Be assured of God’s love. 

 

 

 

My final writing assignment to my HS writing students was to start a blog. They are doing a terrific job. Check out their posts on www.takethetimetowriteitdown.wordpress.com. I wanted to share this one with you because I just love the writer’s comment on keeping a journal. She writes, 

“Keeping a journal is living a wide-awake life. Whatever its name—notebook, sketchbook, log, daybook, diary, or journal—the blank book we fill with bits and pieces of our lives affirms and validates our experiences. It also provides a safe place to make discoveries, celebrate one’s story, and to confide, confer, question, and confess. Alert to the outside world, attuned to the inner one, the journal keeper lives with the consciousness that his or her life matters” (Graham ix). 

It begged the question, “Janell, are you living a wide-awake life?”

“On the way home from having maintenance done on my car, 
I began seeing signs for ”Faith Farms. Fresh strawberries.” 
“Fabulous,” I thought. “Fresh, local strawberries.” The signs led me
to a quaint local farm, off the beaten path.
 As I drove down the long, winding gravel road, I felt far away.
The sounds of the city were slowly fading into the background and 
the smells of country living filled the air. 

The only sound I could hear now was the slight
crunching of the gravel underneath my feet.
All of a sudden, much to my surprise,
a peacock—yes, a full-fledged royal blue crowned peacock—
stood in front of me. Gasping, I couldn’t help exclaiming,
“Well, hello beautiful! How in the world
are you?” My conversation with this stunning bird continued,
“Oh, can I take your picture? Stop! Hold still!”
Luckily, my camera was in the zipper pouch of my purse.
Posing regally, of course, this proud peacock 
honored me with his picture. I couldn’t help but smile.
All I wanted was a basket of organic strawberries.
But, God surprised me with something extraordinary. Why?
Because that is the God we serve. He loves to surprise us. 

 ”Lord, help us live a wide-awake life!”

“A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials, heavy and sudden,
fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity;
when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine,
desert us when troubles thicken around us,
still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her
kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness,
and cause peace to return to our hearts.”
-Washington Irving

Jump over to www.takethetimetowriteitdown.wordpress.com to read today’s post! Blessings!

When I clicked on an email today, written by Candace Rose,I was so blessed I wanted to share it with you. She spends a few moments encouraging us, her family, with the words of Psalm 18:29 (NIV):

“With your help I can advance against a troop;
with my God I can scale [ESV says, "leap over"] a wall.” 

Candace Rose practicing her etiquette at a High Tea in Christchurch, New Zealand!

She writes,

“hello, my beautiful family,

i will first begin by saying tuesday was a rather good day, so i hope
the same can be said for all your tuesdays, whether eastern or western
hemisphere.

i just mentioned to dad a poignant verse that struck me from verse 18
and while i thought i wouldn’t have time to send out a full-fledged
email on it until this weekend, i figured now might be an especially
good time for us all to hear it:

“For by you I can run against a troop, and by my God I can leap over a
wall” (proverbs 18:29, ESV).

I CAN LEAP OVER A WALL.

what awesome imagery, ay?? to me, that was just an automatic shot in
the arm (shot of an energy-boosting IV, that is!) it was an instant
confidence booster, a kick in the butt in regards to anything i am
doubting God over.

personally, i feel all of us have walls we need God’s help to leap over.

dad – the situation at work, lack of big kitchen jobs, lack of new
customer contacts
mom – the direction of ministry, your return to academia
brooke – the situation with your missions trip support, needing $880 more
grant – the situation of needing a summer job, of not being able to
sleep at night

and i think the list could go on….

and the walls don’t have to be quite as literal as needing a certain
amount of money or a certain number of kitchens. they can be more
vague, something intangible, like a wall of discouragement, a wall of
doubt, a wall of lack of purpose, a wall of anger…

there’s not much else i want or need to say – i think the verse speaks
for itself and echos philippians 3:14, “i can do all things through
Christ who strengthens me.”

today, my family, i encourage you to run against the troop that’s
pressing against you. i encourage you to leap over the wall in front
of you. and if you don’t think you can make it, think of God kneeling
down beside it, locking his fingers together in an upside-down basket
to give you a leg-up.”

Candace encourages us to envision God’s fingers together 
in an upside-down basket; giving us a lift in order
to scale the wall. Go ahead—with God’s help, you will get to the other side of 
the wall in front of you. Please let me know how it looks on the other side.
I’m praying for you!

 

This past Sunday, my worship leader, Mark, sang Chris Tomlin’s, “I Will Rise.”
It took by breath away and ministered to a deep place in my heart.
I haven’t been able to get it out of my mind or off my lips.  
And, today, images and interviews of Columbine families,
those who perished and those who survived,
were remembered. Let us remember, too.

Remember that life is short. Life is fragile.
Life is meant to be lived fully and wholly for Christ.
In the following video, Chris Tomlin shares the message behind the music.
Take a few moments toglimpse
into your future—a future with Jesus—laden with peace, not pain.
THE GRAVE IS OVERWHELMED.